Lea Brovedani: The Trust Architect
Lea Brovedani:
The Trust Architect
Lea Brovedani Leaning

Is Your Anger Getting in the Way of Being Trusted?

“A wise parent understands the confusion of an angry child.”
– James Baraz from Awakening Joy –

How many of you are feeling there is more trust in the world than there ever was before? Come on. Show of hands. Anyone?

I didn’t think so. Trust has taken a nosedive. Right now I think we are all feeling like angry children and we are confused about who and what to trust. There are things we must consider when we’re looking at navigating the road to trust during COVID times.

Positive emotions, like happiness, help to increase our trust. We perceive others to be more moral when they evoke those positive emotions. Not only is our trust affected by our own emotions but also our judgment of others’ trustworthiness. If someone can convince us they care deeply for us and tug at our heartstrings, we’re more likely to believe their story or buy the product they’re selling. In order to make the right decision, we have to look beyond the glossy video and do the research.

Years ago my Mom was approached by a man who identified himself as an investigator with the bank she did business with. He had a lot of background information on her and her account. We figure he went through her garbage and found bank statements that he used in his phone conversations. With soothing tones and strokes to her ego, he asked her to help him in a fraud investigation to capture unscrupulous bank employees from stealing funds. He convinced her to take out $1000 and meet him in the parking lot of the bank. He said he would mark the bills and then take them into the bank where the “sting” would happen. He assured her she would get all of her money back, and the person who was stealing from honest folks like her would be put in jail.

It’s unbelievable to me that my mother fell for this… but she did. Fortunately, she went to the wrong spot for their meeting and she didn’t lose any money. My family contacted the police who told us that there was nothing they could do since nothing had been stolen.

Right now during the pandemic, in this toxic stew of fear, anxiety and anger, many want to believe that all of this is made up. Negative feelings are interfering with our ability to trust. It’s easier to trust something that makes us feel good. Heck, who doesn’t want to believe that we are really all okay, and we can go back to our regular lives?

Be aware of your emotions and the emotions of those around you. Realize the effect they have on your trust and your actions. Be willing to do the research and bring intelligence to your emotions. And for gosh sakes, quit spending so much time on the internet!

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